If you saw the video of Ally, you were as shocked and outraged and incensed as I was. You had to be. I was so disturbed that I can not and will not post pictures or the video of the incident itself. I cannot subject my readers to these horrific images of a child being hurt by an adult who should have been trusted. I can't even post the link to the news articles. You want to see it? You'll have to Google it.
Suffice to say that this 13-year-old girl was held by the arms by her squadmates while her coach stood above her with his hands on her shoulders forcing her into the splits that she was not limber enough for her to do on her own. He called it "breaking".
I call it torture.
I don't care that this coach has done a TEDx talk about how gymnastics saved him out of a difficult life. I don't give a rat's ass that he can tumble and do flips backward and forward clear down the street. I don't care if he's charismatic or compelling or Prince Effing Charming.
What I saw on that video made me sick.
Furthermore, my heart is shattered for the girls who were instructed to "hold her down". Those kids must be a mess right now. Ally was crying hysterically. She was begging her coach to stop. Still, those girls held on--just like their coach told them to do. Think of it... your coach, who you trust, tells you to do something that is not only wrong, but it causes injury to your friend--who is clearly in pain. What are they thinking now? How are they feeling? They are victims in all this too. Children are told to obey the adults who are in charge of them and questioning those adults is not exactly encouraged.
Just so you know? I encourage it as often as is needed.
The crime against this child occurred at a practice on June 6th of this year. Ally's parent's met with him and school officials but nothing seemed to be happening in regard to any resolution. According to ktla.com, Ally's parents repeatedly complained. Finally, Ally's mother Kirsten shared the video to a media outlet and, what do you know?
"That's when the school system took action."
Isn't it funny how organizations seldom seem to want to do the right thing until the whole world is watching?
It's actually not funny at all. It's insidious.
"These girls are 13 to 17 and this is a crucial developmental stage for them," Kirsten Wakefield said. "What kind of message we are sending if we tell them it is all right for an adult to abuse you while you're screaming 'no, stop,' and not be able to do anything about it or speak up and not have any recourse?"
Indeed, Kirsten. You absolutely did the right thing by going public. It seems largely to be the only way justice can be served in cases where children are hurt by adults they trust.
Ally Wakefield says that since the video has gone public, she has been cyberbullied by trolls and tools who apparently couldn't get on the right side of Right if a messenger from God came down and shoved a moral GPS up their butts. Some have even gone so far as to suggest that this brave young lady just kill herself.
However, this little biscuit is standing strong in spite of her injuries, using her voice, and not backing down.
I applaud her.
* Note: To be clear, I do not speak in regard to any specific person, or organizations unless stated explicitly. It would be positively errant to assume there is anything to be inferred "between the lines". When I speak, I do so plainly and directly. I speak in general about social patterns that I have observed in the unfortunate, ubiquitous examples that are afforded to me in the headlines and news stories. I am not clergy, nor am I part of the legal system. I am not a doctor, counselor, or therapist. I'm just a girl who has a story and is not afraid to tell it. I am well within my rights to speak about these issues as I have done for the last few decades.
Daisy Rain Martin is an author, speaker, advocate, and educator as well as a founding member of The Flying M-Inklings Writing Group. She lives with her husband, Sean-Martin, in the beautiful state of Idaho and teaches English and Literature during the school year to the best 7th graders the world over. Daisy spends her summers writing, speaking, researching, creating, gardening, and canning. Hope Givers: Hope is Here, is the sequel, of sorts, to her comedic, spiritual memoir, Juxtaposed: Finding Sanctuary on the Outside, which was her publisher's (Christopher Matthews) #1 top selling book in 2012. She has also written a free e-book for anyone who has or is currently being sexually abused called, If It’s Happened to You, which appears in its entirety in Hope Givers. Please follow her weekly blog, SATURDAISIES, which addresses a plethora of current issues including child advocacy, all things hilarious, and matters of the heart. She would love for you to join the Rainy Dais Community by friending her on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.
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